It won’t surprise you to learn that music is one of the most common strategies respondents told me they use to calm themselves when they feel overwhelmed by bad news. Music can quiet the worried chatter that keeps you on edge. It can remind you of good times. It might even make you want to get up and start dancing.
Yet, despite the frequent mention of music as a favourite way to lift mood, only one person considered it to be their most effective coping mechanism–in fact, it was frequently found near the bottom of the list of strategies that work best.
This puzzled me, so to find out more, I tried comparing respondents in different ways.
First, I looked at how people of different ages rated the effectiveness of music as a coping strategy. It turns out there’s no clear pattern—respondents who reported using music ranged from 14 to 72 years old, and at no particular age was music the most or least helpful strategy. There were also no noticeable differences in music’s effect across genders, nor did the type of music chosen appear to make any difference.
Next, I decided to try comparing my respondents with another group, clients who’ve attended my clinic looking for help with high levels of anxiety. For these individuals, I often suggest they listen to music to block out or distract themselves from their worrying thoughts. This is generally a highly successful strategy, although it often requires refining before it works well. In particular, paying attention to two aspects of the playlists clients create can make a big difference to the effectiveness of those playlists.
Because particular songs are often associated with the circumstances in which we first hear them, I start by asking clients to tell me why they’ve chosen the songs on their playlist. What memory does each song trigger, and how does each one make them feel? They then eliminate any songs that make them feel sad or despondent, and prioritise those that remind them of good times and help them feel happy, safe, and/or relaxed.
Next, we consider familiarity. If the client has heard a particular song many times, unfortunately it becomes fairly easy to listen to it on ‘autopilot’—which means they may still be aware of their worrying thoughts even while the music is playing. A much better approach is to look for songs they not only like, but that also encourage them to pay attention–songs with lyrics that tell a story; complex rhythms; songs that they’ve only heard recently (under happy circumstances of course!) I also ask them to change or at least reorder their playlist regularly (every two or three weeks). That way it’s harder to predict which piece they’ll hear next, which encourages them to listen with greater attention.
This month’s takeaway
Listening to or playing music is a popular calming strategy when someone is feeling overwhelmed and anxious. However, it will only work well if you take time to choose the music carefully.
If you want music that’s most likely to help calm you, create a playlist of songs that call up positive memories, songs you’re familiar with but you don’t know totally by heart. Make sure your playlist is easily accessible, and change the contents every two or three weeks to keep it fresh and enticing.