‘When you think about what’s going on in the world, how does that make you feel?’
This was the first question I asked the people I interviewed, and the replies were overwhelmingly gloomy. Not one individual offered a positive response; instead, ‘frightened’, ‘apprehensive’, ‘pessimistic’, ‘depressed’ and ‘anxious’ predominated. These were powerful feelings as well–when asked to rate the strength of that feeling on a scale of one to ten, most people chose seven or higher. And when asked to elaborate, the dominant theme was a sense of helplessness. Anne, a 59-year-old primary school teacher, put it well when she commented simply that so many of the bad things feel ‘beyond my control’.
However, when I asked my next question, ‘When you think about your own situation, including your future prospects, how does that make you feel?’ the responses were almost always positive and hopeful. It looks like copers have learned to focus more on the here and now in their own lives rather than on global situations. This is wise, because research has shown that people who feel they have no agency–no ability to control what’s going to happen–can easily become vulnerable to depression. They recognise they can’t change world events, so they turn to events and duties in their own lives. Once there, an easy and common way to start is to make a list of what needs to be done.
But there are lists and lists, as I soon learned! Respondents who keep running lists–endless running lists–of ‘to do’ items, soon felt discouraged and just as out of control as when they started their list. Similarly, those who note down impossibly large tasks, for example, ‘sort out everything in the loft’, quickly become similarly discouraged.
What, then, makes for a ‘good’ list?
Karen, a 30-year-old trainee solicitor, has an excellent strategy, one that both helps her feel focused and permits a frequent sense of accomplishment. Karen sets aside five minutes at the end of each day, when she writes down everything she hopes to accomplish the following day, in any order, simply as they occur to her. This represents a sort of ‘wish list’, because of course she would be unlikely to accomplish everything. (By the way, make sure the items are all written on one side of a piece of paper, or make them fit entirely into one screen shot, so you can see everything you hope to finish at once).
She then breaks any item that would take more than an hour to accomplish down into smaller steps, so that no item would take her longer than 60 minutes. Her list is of course longer now, but each item is manageable.
Next, she asks herself, ‘if I could only do one thing tomorrow, which item would I choose?’ That’s marked as number one. She then asks the same question of the remaining items–and so on, until she’s rank ordered the entire list.
Finally, she writes down ONLY the first item on her list on a post-it note, places it where she will see it first thing the next morning, then puts her full list somewhere accessible but out of sight. That is the only ‘to do’ she will focus on until she’s completed it. At that point she gets out her full list, writes item two onto a post-it note and replaces the completed post-it note with her new one. She then crosses off item one and puts the full list away once more.
At the end of the day, Karen discards her full list. This is important: if you try this, and just use the full list until all items are ticked off, you’ll be less efficient than if you make a new list each evening. This is because whenever we accomplish our prioritised task, it will alter the importance of the remaining items.
Karen’s strategy is brilliant. One by one, the important things get done and she can enjoy a well-deserved sense of accomplishment.
This month’s takeaway
Making a fresh list each day and rank ordering what you hope to accomplish helps you remain focused on what’s most important. Breaking each task into manageable steps allows you feel more in control. And don’t forget to tick off each item as soon as you finish it–proof that you’re staying in charge of your goals that day!